All right guys I'm really excited about the topic for today's video because
we're gonna talk about one of my favorite diagrams and how you can use it
to really understand how to change your life, now sounds like a huge and broad
statement but we're gonna dive in and for a lot of people I've shared this
with this has been a pretty eye-opening experience to really understand how this
diagram works so let's let's first draw it here and we're just gonna do a small
version of it and a very crooked square as usual cuz you guys know how great my
handwriting is, so one of the things that I've learned about life over the past
several years is that we have no control over certain things, right, you can't
control everything about your life. There are things that --
can happen around you that have nothing to do with your performance, right, you
can't -- you can control whether you swerve out in front of somebody and get into a
wreck but you can't really control whether somebody turns out in front of
you and cuts you off, right, so it's just a good example of the fact that we can't
control everything and this statistic I'm about to share with you is not an
actual statistic, right, it's more of just a conceptual way of thinking about this
but the thing that I think a lot of people forget is that we have control we
don't have control over everything right but we do have control over a lot and I
would even venture to say the majority so for now let's look at it as maybe like
an 80/20 split, right, 20% of everything that happens in your life you don't have
control over it at all like it's things that can happen to you ways that other
people act towards you just even the factors like where you were born and how
you were raised and things like that that are just outside your control, right,
the 80% is things you can control it's the fact that you wake up every day and
you do have the ability to make your own decisions now you do have the ability to
surround yourself with people who can influence you, you do have the ability to
read certain things to try certain things to experiment you have control
over a lot so one of the things when we really start thinking about how to
change our lives if we're if there's somewhere we're at, let's say it's with
our career maybe it's we're not doing something fulfilling maybe it's with
something like the amount of money we make maybe it's with our
relationships or our weight or whatever right let's say there's something you
want to change well there's this phenomenon if you will that a lot of us
pretty much all of us have noticed happens and we refer to it as something
like "when it rains it pours", right, have you ever thought about why it pours when
it rains? Like why does why is that true what but we all know that it happens
right we can all feel it, it seems like it always happens well the more
businessy word for that is momentum and there's actually a diagram like I shared
with you a second ago that I'm gonna draw up on this board that will show you
a little bit of how momentum works again 80/20 right 80% of the time it tends to
work this way and it's something that is going to show you how that you can
control your 80% if you want to change something about the way that your life
is right now you've got that 80% and that's where you want to start
you never can control the entire picture again but you can control that 80% part
of it you can control so even if there are elements that are really really hard
to deal with you gotta focus on the part that you can control and start there so
most valuable part of this diagram that I'm going to share with you is that it
shows you which parts of a process you can control so here's what I mean so in
this box hopefully you can see this but you've got thoughts okay so these are
this is pretty self-explanatory right the thoughts that you allow to float
around in your head that you dwell on or whatever in the second box is beliefs
and that really beliefs come from your thoughts right the things you dwell on
over and over and over the ways that you in your mind interpret the things that
happen around you they become your beliefs over time so our thoughts shape
our beliefs the next thing is actions so your thoughts shape your beliefs but
your beliefs what you've come to believe about the world and what you've come to
believe are the consequences and the rewards of your actions and things like
that in a way the world works in the way people work, your beliefs about your life
and the way the world works and everything else
your actions that's where motivation comes from is your beliefs, right, if you
believe if you truly believed that you were just one step away from making a
million dollars you'd be very very very motivated to go that one last step right
the problem isn't that we're not motivated the problem is that we don't
believe that that one more step is going to be worth it
that's where motivation comes from so beliefs motivates you to take action and
your actions you probably guess what goes in this one is your results so your
thoughts shape your beliefs which shape your actions and obviously when you take
action sometimes they don't always work out as planned but they shape your
results one way or another for for good or bad or whatever right so your results
come from what you do and your what you do comes from what you believe in what
you believe comes from what you think so here's where it gets really interesting
these aren't just four quadrants it actually goes in an order like you saw a
minute ago and it doesn't really stop with results either so what really
happens is it goes like this and it goes in a constant circle so not only do your
thoughts turn into your beliefs turn into your actions turn into your results
but your results shape your thoughts right so you've pretty because
everybody's experienced this right you fall flat on your face it kind of makes
you start thinking things like oh my gosh I'm really not that good at this or
me and I wonder if I'm even cut out for this at all or maybe I'm maybe I'm
not as good at other people maybe I'm weird maybe I'm awkward and we start
forming thoughts based on the results that we had which then shape our beliefs
which didn't shape our actions which then shape our results so if I have bad
results and I start thinking man I'm really bad at this and that becomes my
belief that I'm really bad at this then I'm probably not going to take as much
action the next time around probably not in the try as hard or even try at all
which makes me even more likely to get the results that I want and when I'm
really don't get the results that I want to really fail I really fall flat and
that shapes my thoughts even more about myself in a negative light so you can
see how this negative momentum happens that can make you feel like you are down
in the dumps before you know it, it's just this downward
spiral, right, the good news is it works the opposite way as well if you think
positive thoughts if you're encouraging yourself if you're thinking
of, if you're visualizing and you're imagining that what you actually want
and you're imagining that you're thinking about things that make you
confident right then that's gonna turn into beliefs that are really going to
serve you and really going to motivate you which means you're gonna probably be
more likely to take more action and more right action which is probably likely to
give you better results which will result in you thinking things like man
I'm actually probably kind of good at this or okay this is working out this is
sweet I'm seeing results like now yeah let's go so you're thinking those
thoughts which is giving you a belief of man this is kind of cool when
I take this action I'm gonna get this result which gives you motivation to
take action you get even better results you think even better thoughts and now
you're all of a sudden on top of the moon right because you've been
experiencing this momentum the whole time now here's where it gets useful
that you can start applying in this is actually something that's really really
really valuable to know about this diagram there are only two boxes in this
diagram that you can control at all you know where they are they are thoughts
and actions and here's why you can't really control your beliefs per se
because they're a byproduct of your thoughts but you think about the most
and how you interpret things around you is what forms your belief you can't just
go in there and change your beliefs if your thoughts don't agree with it right
you also can't just change your results magically you're not a genie and you
don't have one right so you can't just go change your results overnight your
results are a byproduct of other things it starts mainly with your thoughts and
frankly that's the easiest one right and because if you start with your thoughts
it's easy to start thinking different things right now right you can surround
yourself with different people end up in different conversations you can read
different books you can watch different TV you can refuse to allow yourself to
think things you know thoughts that are negative they don't serve you or
whatever and that has an automatic chain reaction
-- very small sometimes but an automatic chain reaction that overtime will
benefit you, so can't really control results or beliefs but you can control
thoughts you can also control actions because while my thoughts do shape my
beliefs would shape my actions I can I can take actions that disagree with what
I believe, right, I can fully believe that it's wrong to do a certain thing but I
can go do it anyway because I want to. I can fully believe that it's right to go
do a certain thing but I can not do it because just not feeling like it right
so we can do we can do or not do things that don't line up with our beliefs and
our thoughts so if you want to change something about your life that basically
means that you need to change your thoughts or your actions, those are the
only things you can you can hijack your actions or you can hijack your thoughts
but unless you do one of those things your beliefs and ultimately your results
will never change so start with the things you can control
realize you can't control everything but also understand why when it rains it
pours through this diagram and know how you can create momentum that goes the
right direction, hijack the process if there's something you don't like
recognize why the process is working if there's something you do like and
protect any thoughts that could endanger that from getting in the way or any
actions that can endanger it from getting in the way so hopefully you've
enjoyed this and gotten some insight from it I know it's one of my favorite
things to talk about because I found it extremely useful in my own life so I'd
love to hear your comments in the comment section below
see how you can apply this maybe you list one thing in the section below that
you're gonna try this out on and I'd love to hear what you're working on so I
can cheer you on and work on it with you so talk to you soon.
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