Let's be honest, if you're like me and you've been single for any amount of
time, there are probably days when you are sick of it. So we're here today for
everyone who's sick of being single. I'm Brenda Florida, life coach and lifestyle
advisor, and I'm gonna get real with you today and share a couple, you know,
personal things about myself, as I have done in the past, but this is
specifically about being single. So I've been single for about, oh my gosh, I guess
17 years now. I got divorced when I turned 40 and I'm 57,
so that's 17 years. And I had one really significant relationship in between
there that was several years, but you know most of the last seventeen years
I've been single and I think there's sort of an art to being single and
enjoying it and, that being said, there are still times where I am just like, "I'm
so sick of it." It's those times where you go out and everybody around you seems to
be a couple or you go to a party or you're with friends and it's like, "Wow,
everybody here except me is either married or they've got their boyfriend
or girlfriend with them," or whatever and it's just easy to feel like the odd man out.
I know Saturday night I decided to take myself out to dinner and I went to
this great restaurant, you know, nearby and I'm at the bar-- because I like, when
I'm eating alone, I like to eat at the bar-- and so I go to the bar and it's
pretty crowded and so I have to wait, you know, I kind of stand behind the people
sitting in chairs and the bartender gets me a drink and, you know, all is well, but
you know, so I'm standing there for a few minutes and I just start to notice. It's
like okay, every person there-- and it was a big bar, there had to have been 30
people easy-- it was all couples. And so, even for me, there are times where
it's just like, "Oh my gosh, am I the only single person out there?" Which of course
is not true. I know from all the years of doing this
that there's just times where you feel that way or you're just tired of it. Like
I generally like being single. I love the freedom of being single and just doing
what I want, you know, when I want and all that goes along with that. And so I love
that aspect of it, but there are still times, you know, that I don't enjoy being
single or I'm sick of it. So what do we do about that? You know, how do we really
support ourselves when we're feeling that way? So I have a couple things I'd
like for you to try. So one, I really do believe that you are a magical being and
by that I mean not necessarily that you are a unicorn, although you might be and
I won't argue if you feel like you are, but that you have magical qualities
about you, that you have things about you that are absolutely unique to you and
make you special and make you magical: that you can put a smile on somebody's
face, that's different than what anybody else can do, and so what I'd like for you
to do is think about maybe three things that you, when you look at yourself--
and if you need some help, you could ask some good girlfriends or something about this--
that make you really unique and special. And it doesn't have to be something
that's like extravagant. You're, you know, the best cook on this side of the
Mississippi or something, but just something that makes you, you. Something
that people are like, oh I love the way, you know, might be the way you dress or
the way you put accessories and clothes together, things like that like, you just
have your own certain style that is something they love about you. Maybe they
love your sense of humor, maybe you just have a really great sense of humor.
Maybe you have a great way of writing and, you know, whether you're an official writer
and you have a blog or a book or something, just when you do some
thing that's a written, you know, word kind of thing, even if it's a business
thing, that you would just really have a special way of doing it. Maybe you have a
really unique way of encouraging people, you know we've all had people-- or hope
you've had-- I certainly have had in my life and in the various businesses that
I've managed or run, where there's somebody in the office who's just the
consummate encourager, you know, they're just always lifting somebody up.
maybe you're that person. So think of a few really tangible ways that you can
articulate and write down that you are special, that you are unique, and just use
those when you're having that moment where it's like, you know, is there
something wrong with me, you know, really, I showered this morning!
Pull that list out if you need to go no, wait a minute, you know, I'm feeling like
I'm being left out or I feel like I'm the only one, you know, who's single, but I
have these great things about me, you know, and that will really help support
you because I know that always when we take care of ourselves, the things
outside of us in our world tend to take care of themselves and we attract
exactly what we're looking for in needing. So I hope that you'll take the
time to write down three things about yourself that you think are really
magical and delightful and I hope that you'll share them with us in the
comments. I would love to hear it. Thanks for joining me. I'm Brenda Florida.
Let's live lavishly!
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