- Hello little buns!
It is Stef Sanjati and Paqs.
- Hey guys.
- And we are in a car.
This is not Dorothy, this is just a car,
but we are en route to Montreal.
This is our first ever Atavists adventure.
We're so excited, if you guys don't know what that is,
because we haven't actually made a video
describing it yet,
basically I'm doing a lot of travel content now.
I'm still me, I'm not changing what I'm talking about,
or who I am, or what I'm about.
I'm just gonna do it in different places with cool people.
- Is that me? - Yes!
- Fuck yeah.
- I'm just really really excited 'cause it means
I get to be passionate and creative,
and do what I want to do.
And I get to bring you guys with me
so there is actually a link to the Patreon
in the description box.
I'd love it if you check it out.
I am gonna be doing a more dedicated video
describing all of this stuff very soon.
I just really wanted to get started
on the adventures so that you could get a good idea
of what we're going to be doing.
There will be an editor involved in the future.
This one's gonna be by me.
We're gonna be working on upgrading our content
to really cool elevated places
and creating multilayered, multi platform stuff,
and it's gonna be all for you.
Let's start the adventure!
(vocal pop music)
- So we just pulled over off the highway
to stop at an en route, get a bite to eat.
Maybe relieve our bladders.
- Oh I don't need to pee, but I really want
a bagel and some soup.
(gong clangs)
- [Phil] What'd you get?
- I got soup in cups.
- [Phil] You look real Canadian right now.
- Oh I'm sure, you know. Workin' on my iconic day in plaids.
Get in the car.
(vocal pop music)
- What's up? I just want to point out
the sky behind me is-- - It's fucking pink.
- ... yellow orange.
The sky behind us is yellow orange Stef,
the sky in front of us is blue purple.
- [Stef] Wow, that's a full spectrum of color,
I'm shitting.
- [Phil] Don't shit in the car please.
- I'm shitting
(Phil laughs)
We are in the outskirts of Montreal right now.
We are waiting for Emilia to tell us her address
because we're going to her house
and we don't to get really deep into downtown
and then realize we have to go way back out.
'Cause there's a few different sections
to Montreal that it could be.
Yes I am blatantly opening my shirt.
Yes I want to look a little bit
like a New York City pimp.
Let me live my life.
Let me be a madam, I don't care.
There's Philly, filling up the gas, suffering.
I can't lower the window, I want to.
I want to say, "Hey, Philly, how you doing man?"
- [Phil] Here you go Stef.
- Thank you!
- [Phil] Oh my god, it's so fucking cold.
- I'm really thirsty, but I didn't want to tell Phil
that I was thirsty because then he'd go get me water,
and I didn't want him to do that
'cause it's cold out and I value his comfort,
and his safety, and his sanity, so ...
I'm gonna drink water when we find Emilia or pizza,
whichever comes first.
Welcome back.
- ... fucking cold it is.
Holy fuck, Jesus.
It's so cold.
(Stef laughs)
- Better?
- I feel like David Dobrik right now.
- Why?
- Except I'm in a Mazda '03 and not a Tesla.
- Is this an angle that he has in his car?
- Kinda.
- That's cool, is that, are you feeling better now?
- Yeah and this one too please.
- Oh, what happened to your finger?
- Oh I must have hurt it.
- Your hands are so dry.
- I know, I don't put moisturizer on them.
- Okay, we need to get you lotion.
We need lotion for the van when we leave here.
- Thank you so much, this is working quite nicely.
- I'm giving you some moisture as well.
- Thanks for being here guys, thanks for being here.
We appreciate your support,
and we can't wait to bring you on more adventures.
- Hold on let me get my seatbelt on
before you launch us into outer space
and I fly through the windshield
and shatter my skull bone against that sign!
(radio plays hip hop music)
Thank you. We can go now.
- Vroom! It's a Mazda.
(Stef laughs)
(vocal pop music)
It is so cold
- I can't feel any of my fingers,
and my ears are on fire and they hurt so bad.
- We literally have to do a pit stop
in a random lobby for an apartment building.
To like regain life.
Let's find a way to stay warm.
- My finger legitimately feels frozen.
When I suck on it, it melts.
- Put it in your pants or something, that's what I do.
I put my hands on my crotch when I'm cold.
We'll see you at Emilia Fart's.
We are in the iconic living quarters of Emilia Fart.
She's awesome, you should definitely check her out.
I'm gonna link everything in the description.
However, our pizza has arrived, we survived the cold,
Stef are you excited?
- Listen I'm so excited, I'm so excited
that I'm working on my phone right now.
I'm also very excited.
(Phil laughs)
- We're stoked.
This is the most iconic moment I've ever been a part of.
(Emilia and Stef scream)
- I feel it.
(screams)
Oh it looks so good!
- [Stef] I'm really happy.
- [Emilia] It's like a real pizza party, okay wait.
- [Stef] Look it's got thick, nope.
- [Phil] It has real cheese.
- [Stef] The other one is thick crust, isn't it?
- Yeah.
- [Stef] Okay, hold on I can hold this, and you can--
- [Emilia] Okay, yeah yeah yeah.
- We'll have it on display like a museum.
- Yeah, we need to see both at the same time.
- Yes, absolutely. Do you have the shot?
- [Phil] Yeah I have the shot.
- Make sure you see--
(Stef gasps)
- [Stef] Oh that is a thick pizza, she's juicy.
- Oh she's juicy.
- Look, she's beautiful.
- Jalapeño.
- [Phil] You guys are both perfect.
We're gonna eat right now and ...
- I don't wanna close this box.
- Yeah, I don't know.
- [Stef] I wanna smell this box.
- [Emilia] There's brownies.
- [Stef] When did that happen?
- [Emilia] I don't know.
- [Phil] What?
(Stef gasps)
- [Stef] Do you see those jalapeño chips?
- [Phil] Stef ...
I'm so happy right now, it's ridiculous.
- [Emilia] You guys ordered so many items.
- [Stef] Literally, I'm so wet.
Do you see? I'm crying.
- [Phil] Those brownies are making me
weirdly happy right now.
- This is actually weak for my eyes.
They're so wet, do you see them?
- [Phil] Yeah I do.
Okay, let's eat.
- [Emilia] Yeah, let's eat.
- [Phil] Let's eat.
(chill music)
- I was voice recording, sending it to someone today
while eating-- This is disgusting.
While eating like, I don't even want to say it.
Eggs gross me out.
- Okay.
- But I was eating a soft-boiled egg.
- [Stef] Interesting.
- While setting a voice memo and it was
just such a disgusting combination
because they couldn't like,
first of all just the visual
of someone eating an egg is disgusting.
- Okay. - I agree.
- One of the most terrifying things
that ever happened to me,
was my nephew ran up to me
and he was mid eating a hard-boiled egg,
had hard-boiled egg chunks all over his
fucking disgusting little kid mouth,
and all the yolk all over his hands, and he's like,
"Auntie Em!," and I'm like, "Get the fuck away from me."
- That's a thriller movie.
- Yes it is! But anyways yeah,
so I'm eating this hard-boiled egg,
I was like hungry and then,
but they can't even see my face,
which would make it a little bit less disgusting.
They only hear the slurps from egg sounds.
- Oh no. - It was awful.
- Okay fair, I'll give it to you.
(tongue pops)
- I think it was, I like that swallow.
- Sorry you just did it.
- One more. One more.
(Emilia tongue pops)
- Oh it's so much better when you do it.
- What the fuck?
(Stef tongue pops)
- Wait.
(Stef tongue pops)
- Woo! - Woo!
- There was bass.
(Phil's tongue clicks)
(Stef tongue pops)
- I ...
- It's not great. - I know.
(Phil laughs)
- I'm sorry.
- You'll learn one day, Philly.
- I regret everything.
- Man, these are good deep-fried pickles.
- Right? They are. Have another one.
- I'm kinda full.
- Oh, I'm living.
- I feel that and then I push past,
because that's just my way.
(Phil laughs)
- I love you guys.
I love you both.
- We're eating, Philip.
- I feel like,
so honored to be here with both of you today.
And this conversation we've been having is incredible.
I mean I really feel like we're connecting.
- We're so connecting.
- Yeah, for sure. - Oh yeah.
- Oh for sure.
I'm gonna drink from your boob cup.
Because my cup is-- - Don't touch the boobs.
- Why?
- I get jealous.
(Emilia laughs)
- Quite frankly, the boobs are happier with me.
- Uh oh! Guys, look.
Let's talk to the boobs and see what they think.
- Okay. Can you hold the boobs up
so we can talk to them?
Boobs.
- What?
(Phil laughs uncontrollably)
- But also, like, tell him how you really feel.
Like do you really believe that in your heart of hearts?
- I swear I do.
- Oh, when did it start having words?
- Oh, I mean, hmm?
(Stef and Phil laugh)
- We had a debate about whether or not
jarring and abrasive sounds were the same.
- Oh, big debate, it's still ongoing.
We don't know. - Yeah, we don't know.
- We looked at descriptions.
- This is a friendly debate. - I think it's different.
- Okay. How?
- Go ahead.
- To me, a jarring sound
makes me go "Huh!"
- Yes, yes! That's what I said!
- No, no, no.
- It's like jarring sound is sudden.
- No, you said abrasive!
- Jarring sound is sudden, you're like oh!
- No!
- And abrasive is like--
- Yeah, yeah yeah yeah.
- That's what I said.
- Sorry.
- No, I think you have it reversed.
- No, I don't.
Jarring, I know for a fact
I've always believed jarring is sudden.
- Mhmm.
- Jarring is like a bam, or a crash, or an explosion.
- Oh no, yeah you're right, I'm wrong.
What, is Emilia like the speaker of all truths?
Is that what she is?
- Yeah, absolutely.
- Absolutely, you're right, yeah I am wrong.
I will take the L.
- I'm Einstein. - And Jesus.
- Yeah, and Jesus, and Moses. - Yeah.
- They live inside my body, and that's who I am.
- That's fair.
- So everything that I say is actually just a story.
- And also the sun god Ra.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
- And Zeus? - Yeah.
- Also Hercules. - Oh.
- And then also Megan from the Hercules movie.
- She's my favorite.
- She's really hot.
- Okay, and I love her song, the,
what is it, the one where she's like,
I won't say it, I'm -- - In love.
- Whatever. Won't say I'm in love, whatever.
That fucking song-- - The ponytail!
- The ponytail is huge!
Sorry, I just really like it.
- No it's really good.
- I love massive ponytails and like,
you're a horse person.
- Yes, yes yes yes! - And I love it.
- Yeah. - Give me a compliment!
- Yes. - You're pretty.
- Thank you!
(Emilia laughs)
- You're handsome.
- Thank you! - Isn't he?
Your eyeliner is perfect. - Stop!
- You are perfect. - Stop!
- No, it's true, you're perfect.
- Okay.
- Oh, see? Three times.
And then it's accepted.
- Yeah.
- That's like Minnesota etiquette.
- You have to say it three times?
- Yes, and you have to offer leftovers three times
before you're allowed to say yes to accepting them.
Aww, Tuesday!
- Oh my goodness gracious!
It's not appropriate.
(Stef laughs)
Tuesday ... Tuesday! Tuesday!
- Do you want me to like, move the box?
- No, it's fine. Tuesday, it's so rude.
It's 'cause I'm not talking in my cat voice
'cause I'm shy about it.
- Oh. You can do it.
- I'll wait 'til he goes away.
- Okay.
(Stef and Phil laugh)
We can turn the camera off for that.
- No, it's fine. - Okay.
(Emilia screams in high-pitched voice)
Oh my god, it immediately made a difference.
- Yeah, no, he like-- - That's incredible!
- It's so rude.
(Emilia gibbers in high-pitched voice)
(Stef laughs)
Literally, he's so brazed.
- I'm ready to bleed.
(Emilia laughs)
I'm ready to bleed.
- But then the more you do it, the less you bleed.
- That's a shame.
Do you guys wanna know a secret?
The camera died.
(tongue pops)
Oops!
We're in Ottawa now.
We've left Montreal.
Our Montreal adventure was beautiful.
I wanna be very clear with you guys,
that video, I mean this video,
very much is a prototype.
We still don't have an editor.
I mean it's very much just a regular vlog,
but it's not exactly where we wanna go
with the whole Atavists thing
and I don't know if I've explained
the Atavists thing to you yet,
because our upload schedule
is all flipped around and sideways,
but I would love it if you guys would check out
the Patreon, it's in the description box.
Please be aware,
you do not have to contribute to the Patreon.
The Patreon is just behind the scenes content,
if you want it, or if you wanna be more involved
in the adventures personally
in a way that you can influence everything, right?
But I will still be uploading
all of my regular content here,
and I'll be doing a lot more of it.
So I really wanna make sure you guys understand that
nothing major is changing with the Atavists thing.
Really, all it is is a name
for the duo of me and Paqs. That's it.
It doesn't mean I'm changing my content in a major way.
It doesn't mean that I am changing as a person
in a major way.
All it really means,
and I will explain all of this in its own dedicated video,
I really will.
But all it really means
is that I'm not going to be doing videos
exclusively in my apartment,
and I'm not going to be doing videos alone
most of the time.
But I'm still the same person,
the same thoughts, opinions, feelings, anger.
You know what I mean?
And it's just really important to me
that you guys understand that.
This is not a sponsored life.
This is not, like the whole reason we're doing Patreon
is to avoid having to have everything be sponsored.
So I will explain all of it in time.
If you guys have specific questions,
please ask them in the comments.
I will try my best to answer them.
But just know that everything I'm doing
is so that I can be here more for you,
so that I can be happier,
so that I can make more for you.
Everything I'm doing is for you.
And I don't know how to really articulate that
in the best way, but I hope you guys understand that.
There's so much that I want to show you
and it's all gonna happen.
It's all gonna happen.
If you guys wanna see more of the Emilia Fart pizza party,
because our camera died,
I should have said that in the beginning.
(tongue pops)
Okay. I'll just say it now and then edit it in there.
So you'll have already heard it.
But I'm gonna leave this part in
so you can giggle at the fact
that I did it backwards.
Cool.
If you guys wanna see more of our Emilia Fart pizza party,
you can check out Paqs' channel where he's done a more
full take on that part of the day,
and I'll put a link to that in the description,
a card, all that good stuff.
Until next time, just remember,
I love you so much,
and I will see you again very soon.
You are my whole life.
You can follow me at my regular socials.
You can follow Paqs at his socials.
You can follow us as a duo, the Atavists,
on all of the socials in the description box.
We love you, I love you, and I will see you later.
Have the best morning, evening, afternoon,
whatever time it is where you are. Okay?
Have the best of it. Bye!
(blows kisses)
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