Waching daily Jun 18 2017

My onion is growing its own green onion, it's got a baby! You know what I do?

Yesterday, this had none and I just put some chi into it, some "reiki" energy.

And then it just sprouted today. Wow! Hahaha

What you see here is about to have a transformation and transforming is the name of the game today my friend.

And it's all about transforming our health habits.

So today, we're taking something that normally has loads and copious amounts of sugar in it.

And we're going to make a delicious salad dressing. Most salad dressings loaded with sugar, let's face it!

If you go to the grocery store and you look in the aisle, you don't want to eat that stuff.

My food extraordinaire, he's basically a chef, and you aren't really, right?

That's right! What kind of, you went to school for it? Alright, well, right!

We're gonna make a superfood salad. How long can you make a salad? Easy!

Hmm. We can make it in five minutes. Kids will love it.

Niels everyone! Maybe you've seen him in the past Saturday Strategy. We're back in the kitchen today!

Let's go ! What are the ingredients Niels?

So we're going to start by putting in some garlic, vinegar, green onions, a little bit of lime.

In not in your traditional sense but we're going to add some of that in there.

Look at this this powerhouse right here! Yeah, garlic, who knows what a garlic is good for.

Leave a comment below! We want to hear what you think about garlic.

We're going to start the base of this with some of that powerhouse garlic, some green onions here.

So we're going to take the little knife, and we're going to give this garlic a little whack.

And now it's basically minced and ready to go! Did you just just slice the garlic in like two seconds?

That's something, that's why you get the little knife right here.

Boom! Garlic in. We're gonna get some green onion in there.

One of my favorite ways to balance the flavor profile in a vinaigrette - this little guy, the apple.

So what I'll do is I'll just take the skin off of this.

And after the skin is off, I will throw this whole thing in our little Vitamix.

The magic with this apple is it's going to bring us some sugar content in here.

But it's not table sugary. It's got the fiber, it's got you know, well pectin right? Yes!

So the pectin part that he mentioned before, that actually helps your vinaigrette stay together

and stay emulsified so it's not separating all the time.

Ah, this little guy, the lime is going to give us some acidity in this vinaigrette.

And most people, they just juice the inside, but I like to get the, the skin has all your essential oils.

So I like to get some of that skin in there.

Ahh! Look at the oils, you see them shooting out.

And that's going to give you ten times the flavor as the juice that's inside of it.

Wow! It just permeated the whole room, maybe we should make a margarita after this! Yes!

Alright, so in here so far we got some apple, we've got green onion, we've got some lime zest.

Let's put some fresh herbs in there, is that thyme? This is some fresh thyme smell that, get in there!

It's going to give the punch of fresh flavor, depth of flavor, phytonutrients in there as well!

Let's get some fresh basil in here.

Here's the next item, looks like water but this is actually just some white vinegar.

I like white vinegar because it keeps things kind of sweet still and that's about a quarter cup.

We're going to put some organic EVOO - extra virgin olive oil and some avocado oil.

A secret lock on that - childhood connection!

We'll do about half extra-virgin olive oil and then we'll do about half of the avocado oil.

As you see, I would start getting a little more business in there.

Let's start pulling all those flavors in, the avocado oil.

When it comes down to making a vinaigrette, you want about 1/3 or 1/4 vinegar and then 3/4 olive oil.

So like a 3:1 ratio. This is going to be done, we want to have a stop for a second.

We're going to sprinkle a little salt in here, look at it, it's going to be.

Wow! Nice salad emulsified deliciousness smells so good, smells so fragrant, right? So fragrant.

So we're going to give it a little bit of salt. Usually I try to start with about a half teaspoon,

which is about 'yey' much.

We always want to taste it we want to make sure we're there.

Oh dude, that's so good, that's legit!

We're going to put the ingredients on the side by the way guys and then be in the description below

if you're watching this on YouTube.

We've got our beautiful salad dialed in. we've got packed with healthy fats

packed with plant-based protein and now we're going to get the fley rock.

Delicious! It's got fats, it's got the phytonutrients, the enzymes, the aminos

- everything you need in a complete meal right there without all the extra sugar

and the fatty crap that's on there, what do you think?

This came to your table, I would be stoked. How much did you pay for this?

$24. I would pay $58. Alright guys, so here's a delicious salad.

Niels, thank you for joining us in the kitchen once again. My pleasure, kind of fun!

Easy ingredients we're going to leave it below. Make this let us know what you think.

If you learned anything at all in this video, give it a big thumbs up.

I'm Drew Canole and remember we're in this together.

Hahaha.

For more infomation >> 5 minute Homemade Summer Salad Dressing - Duration: 5:21.

-------------------------------------------

The Most Oddly Satisfying Video 2017 (MUST WATCH) #3 - Duration: 12:41.

Video The Most Oddly Satisfying Video 2017

Like, Subscribe for more videos

Don't forget Like and Subscribe ... Thankyou very much !!!

Wishing you more fun with my videos !

View more videos in the description of this video!

Don't forget Like and Subscribe ... Thankyou very much !!!

For more infomation >> The Most Oddly Satisfying Video 2017 (MUST WATCH) #3 - Duration: 12:41.

-------------------------------------------

FRIENDS MAKE YOU MORE HEALTHIER & HAPPY IN LONG RUN! - Duration: 4:47.

Kuras they encourage people to bars well I'm very excited to share this video

because it will acknowledge you with very important information which will be

handy in future William topic an associate professor of psychology and

the author of the study says friends are a conscious choice and then you need

your friend in general if you do not become serious for little things

secondly they are in judgmental and instead provide you an outlet hey how

are you stupid well I'm just like your dick only night

of fun on the other on family relationships can be negative serious

and monotonous you need to tell false statements just to make them happy and

if you said or did something against them then father I don't want to do iid

think you will do IIT now boarded the research concluded to study both 90,000

people were gathered from more than 90 countries the study found that who

valued friendship was highly healthier and happier especially bored when they

turn older sick seriously each other so many people from 90 countries a lot of

blogging here and taking you a survey of seven thousand four hundred eighty one

people h2 with fifty results were astonishing when they are the same

people about their relations with them till next six years

most of the people should train let's go

here the reason behind there will be a license there's some even to family but

they were only few number

see the thing is that we shouldn't ignore our me but that friends make us

feel better it is said that people who have strong social relationship bonds or

have true close friends they're also survival are increasing over seven you

if your health will be good then ultimately you will live for long signs

but usually after marriage when you cannot control your sexual emotions you

multiply your generation and because of that your brain circles

generally goes down from five or six to two or three cultivating good quality

friendship across our lives is beneficial routine self-esteem and

puffing against stress last but not least we tend to trip friendship between

artificial

listening and be trustworthy are important in good friendships the same

qualities that could enhance the relationships so hope you learn the

lifelong knowledge today don't feel fear to comment on the dog because this moves

on be guarded it

so have a nice day and hear this video with your true friend

and

For more infomation >> FRIENDS MAKE YOU MORE HEALTHIER & HAPPY IN LONG RUN! - Duration: 4:47.

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Let's Play/MST... Les Manley: Search for the King - Duration: 2:08:16.

Megane 6.7: Hello, I'm Megane 6.7...

Megane 6.7: ...and I'm here with my friends Kizzy Caspy and Zoogz.

Megane 6.7: And today, we'll be riffing on the PC adventure game 'Les Manley: Search for the King'!

Kizzy Caspy: Hey everybody, what's up? Glad to be back again!

Zoogz: Hello, I'm Zoogz...

Zoogz: Thank you for joining us today, folks...

Zoogz: I hope you enjoy the ride and...

Zoogz: Trust me when I say...

Zoogz: ...it's not at all copyright infringement.

Megane 6.7: We hope you enjoy this LP/MSTing...

Megane 6.7: ...and feedback is always welcome.

Megane 6.7: If you like this Let's Play...

Megane 6.7: ...there's information about our other projects...

Megane 6.7: ...at the end of the video.

Megane 6.7: WILL we play this game? Gentlemen, what are your thoughts?

Zoogz: It's ironic, the soap opera music playing in the background...

Kizzy Caspy: <Dramatic Voiceover> Will J.B. acknowledge his twin brother second from the left?

Kizzy Caspy: <Dramatic Voiceover> Will Ed, Ned, and Ted on the right just look at each other and start kissing?

Kizzy Caspy: <Dramatic Voiceover> Find out next time on... "NETWORK"!

Megane 6.7: Panhandling for petty cash.

Zoogz: J.B? You sure this isn't "J.K"?

Zoogz: This looks suspiciously like 'Time Chasers'...

Kizzy Caspy: Tony Schiavone? Who let you in here!? SECURITY!

Zoogz: Check supermarkets in Michigan, I hear they see Elvis all the time there.

Megane 6.7: Dennis Franz goes EGA.

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, the Presley Estate is really easy-going about people exploiting its properties. Go nuts!

Megane 6.7: More like "roll the dice".

Zoogz: Hey look, off to the left! Peggy Olsen's legs!

Megane 6.7: But ONLY her legs. She isn't ALLOWED to sit with the MEN...

Kizzy Caspy: I guess J.B. *AND* R.J Fletcher believe... <said in a New Jersey Accent> BROADS don't belong in BROADcasting...

Megane 6.7: Whoops! Wrong tape!

Megane 6.7: We all have seven days to live now.

Megane 6.7: Sorry.

Zoogz: What, is "lunkhead" the brother of Meathead?

Kizzy Caspy: Ahh, I miss 80's PG slang...

Kizzy Caspy: Oooh, I hope somebody gets called a 'Slimeball'!

Kizzy Caspy: Or 'Scumbag'!

Kizzy Caspy: I LOVE 'Scumbag'!

Zoogz: Tech support... OF THE 80s!

Megane 6.7: Don Knotts IS Les Manley!

Kizzy Caspy: Meanwhile, everyone born in the year 2000...

Kizzy Caspy: ...is wondering what the HELL that thing is on Les's desk.

Megane 6.7: Hell, the suits can barely dress themselves.

Zoogz: Knock it over!!

Megane 6.7: Yeah! Throw it out the window!

Megane 6.7: Aww...

Kizzy Caspy: It's amazing how a cigar can produce an insane amount of smoke...

Kizzy Caspy: ...and yet the room remains as clear as a crisp spring morning.

Zoogz: Ha ha, they got Rickrolled!

Megane 6.7: Ahh, internet memes...

Megane 6.7: ...never gonna give.. them.. up.

Megane 6.7: That's some nice side-glancing there.

Kizzy Caspy: Stella and Stanley here should've stuck with the streetcar.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Heck, my chess set has two of them!

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Back in a jiffy!

Zoogz: As he hoofs it to 'King Soopers'.

Megane 6.7: Considering his workplace, does that mean the game's only fifteen minutes long?

Zoogz: FEEL the POWER of the INTRO MUSIC!

Megane 6.7: That bass line really has me a-hoppin'.

Megane 6.7: ...A less dated premise?

Kizzy Caspy: Jerry Lawler?

Megane 6.7: Jack Kirby?

Zoogz: Bruce Campbell?

Kizzy Caspy: 'Those Held Responsible'?

Kizzy Caspy: Pffft... sounds about right.

Kizzy Caspy: Holy shit, who blew out the wall!?

Megane 6.7: Heh... Maybe it's the cave from 'The Weird Al Show'?

Zoogz: Is that ductwork or Les's 'habitrail'?

Zoogz: For a two-bit knockoff network president who hasn't one clue.

Kizzy Caspy: I'm happy that they're letting the electronic tuba carry the melody.

Zoogz: Saving electricity by winding video tape would be like...

Zoogz: ...using a 10 cent off coupon at the Chevrolet dealership.

Megane 6.7: Considering how many times you 'eye-fondled' her cleavage...

Megane 6.7: ...I think the secret's out, Les.

Kizzy Caspy: Luckily, Vice-President Armani wants to see you in his office RIGHT NOW!

Megane 6.7: And it sure as hell can't carry a tune.

Kizzy Caspy: Unless you're Adam Levine.

Zoogz: Corky from 'Live Goes On'?

Megane 6.7: Natch.

Zoogz: She checks herself in the mirror at a water cooler? Wha??

Kizzy Caspy: I'd riff on the size of her mirror but let's face it...

Kizzy Caspy: ...this is an adventure game where everyone has a bottomless pocket-dimension in their pants.

Zoogz: You're totally talking about Les and not the person playing the GAME... right?

Kizzy Caspy: Well... that explains the white stains all over the floor...

Kizzy Caspy: Eww.

Megane 6.7: As poor Les discovered when he had to leave a Van Halen concert on a stretcher.

Zoogz: And are there "megadittoes" coming from the speaker?

Megane 6.7: Oh great, is "Jeremy SPANGLER" on next?

Kizzy Caspy: <British Accent on radio> 'Ello?

Kizzy Caspy: <British accent on radio> I'd like to say that the creep living above me is a total jackass.

Kizzy Caspy: <British Accent on radio> He keeps stomping the floor every time Vinnie cheers on the Yanks!

Zoogz: A Red Sox fan?

Megane 6.7: The Polkaroo?

Kizzy Caspy: OF... CARRRRTOOOOOONS!

Megane 6.7: Personally, I'd rather search for Dixie.

Megane 6.7: <Harry Ding on radio> Only one less than our weekly UFO sighting.

Megane 6.7: <Harry Ding on radio> Speaking of which... Charlie from Roswell, you're on the air...

Zoogz: (typing on keyboard) Uuuussssseee... chaaaaiiinnnnsawwwwww..

Megane 6.7: The Thermos apparently doubles as a McDLT.

Zoogz: Ahh, remember those?

Kizzy Caspy: God bless the 80s.

Megane 6.7: Plus his mom was too cheap to buy one for him.

Kizzy Caspy: Back then... and to this very day.

Megane 6.7: They should've gone with a 'Monkees' marathon.

Zoogz: No, you'll drown the Sea-Monkeys!

Zoogz: (confused) Wait...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Last time I ate peanut butter without water...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> I was legally dead for two minutes before they revived me!

Zoogz: No, we aren't talking about Usagi at Craft Services...

Megane 6.7: Yeah...

Megane 6.7: That'd be more like...

Megane 6.7: <Usagi> *Gargg gargg gargg gargg*...!!

Megane 6.7: (sighs) OK, did a 12 year old write this? Seriously.

Kizzy Caspy: Considering how wimpy Les is...

Kizzy Caspy: ...I'm amazed that belch didn't rupture his esophagus.

Kizzy Caspy: Manners. They're worth at least ten points.

Zoogz: Did I just watch one of those 50s shorts with the narrator coaching the hapless kid?

Megane 6.7: Nah, that would be more like THIS...

Megane 6.7: <50s Narrator> Lester is a fine example of an American...

Megane 6.7: <50s Narrator> He never forgets to start his mornings with crisp clean American water every day.

Megane 6.7: <50s Narrator> And he ALWAYS excuses himself whenever he has to pass gas from his mouth.

Megane 6.7: <50s Narrator> Only Godless Communist SCUM would ever consider otherwise.

Megane 6.7: <50s Narrator> Ask yourself, America...

Megane 6.7: <50s Narrator> Are you willing to be... Les Manley?

Megane 6.7: <50s Narrator> Good night.

Megane 6.7: It says... 'Mastrubating, Keep Out! Love and Kisses, The Janitor'.

Kizzy Caspy: But somehow you feel better anyway.

Megane 6.7: Les Manley... member of the Underground Resistance.

Kizzy Caspy: What, you expect a manager to actually MANAGE something? Pffft.

Zoogz: <Announcer from TV> It's a circus of Camrys, Concordes, and Cavaliers...!

Zoogz: <Announcer from TV> Come to Col. Bob's Traveling Circus of Used Carrrrrrs!

Megane 6.7: <Windows Update> ...will require a reboot in order to finish installing.

Megane 6.7: <Windows Update> Reboot your computer now?

Megane 6.7: Lyla Libido...

Megane 6.7: Wonder if she's related to Lois Lust?

Kizzy Caspy: Is that a porn star?

Megane 6.7: Probably.

Zoogz: You would not BELIEVE how newsworthy this is!

Megane 6.7: Must be Fox News covering Spring Break again.

Zoogz: No, still.

Zoogz: Says the employee who rewinds video tapes while jerking off on the phone...

Zoogz: ...and yet still managed to score his own personal office?

Kizzy Caspy: Wait, if this guy is the boss, then who was that bald guy from the intro?

Megane 6.7: Accolade could only afford to hire Dennis Franz for five minutes... tops.

Zoogz: What, the boss is a janitor too?

Kizzy Caspy: Maybe they're the keys to the city, considering they're the... size of your head?

Megane 6.7: <Mr. Burnbaum> Pilfering Peon! To the PIT with you!

Kizzy Caspy: Yikes...

Kizzy Caspy: Needless to say... Shrek was PISSED.

(Teleportation FX)

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Really? What DO they let you into?

Zoogz: <Mr. Burnbaum> Fuck if I know.

Zoogz: Is this your face in the security camera?

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> To cover the Lila Libido story...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> I can block her sun too!

Kizzy Caspy: Considering the station's financial woes...

Kizzy Caspy: ...Les may not want his boss looking into his... *personal* phone calls.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> W-ell, can I at least have a new phone with more durable buttons?

Megane 6.7: At least until he goes home to his wife.

Zoogz: Yeah right, he has no personnel file.

Megane 6.7: He just wandered in off the streets one day and nobody's caught on...

Zoogz: I often suspect the same thing about my co-workers.

Zoogz: He had some sort of stroke aneurysm with his eyes!

Megane 6.7: Solving puzzles by way of creepy leering. Thanks, game!

Zoogz: THRILL as we blackmail the boss FAILINGLY!

Zoogz: If she can get away from Larry Laffer long enough...

Kizzy Caspy: Nah, she already tied him to a bed and stole his money...

Kizzy Caspy: Oh wait. Wrong blonde.

Zoogz: Like the Boss is working now anyway.

Kizzy Caspy: He's high enough that he doesn't have to acknowledge that fact.

Megane 6.7: In more ways than one.

Kizzy Caspy: Dude, you're breaking into a STORAGE CLOSET...

Kizzy Caspy: Get a grip.

Megane 6.7: Well, this was certainly worth risking your...

Megane 6.7: HOLY SHIT, DUDE!

Megane 6.7: Is... Is that a TOOL BOX?!?

Megane 6.7: That's adventure gaming GOLD, man!

Zoogz: Places for sex, more places for sex, and sex toys.

Megane 6.7: If that's true, try not to think about why the walls are yellow...

Kizzy Caspy: Reporter's ID in a toolbox...

Kizzy Caspy: (muttering) ...sure, that sounds legit.

Megane 6.7: Oh, come on!

Megane 6.7: I can see from here there's a lot more stuff in that toolbox...

Megane 6.7: Even if it's all useless...

Megane 6.7: I still want it in my inventory, dammit!

Kizzy Caspy: What a coincidence!

Kizzy Caspy: The person in the photo ID sorta, kinda looks like you too!

Kizzy Caspy: That'll spare us an extra couple of puzzles along the way, huh?

Zoogz: Why the hell would a client come in the rear entrance anyway?

Megane 6.7: Assholes prefer a familar environment when entering a building.

Megane 6.7: Sarcasm or Obliviousness? You make the call!

Megane 6.7: Ask him if he's an extra in 'Planet of the Apes'...

Zoogz: Because waking the sleeping security guard guarantees that...

Zoogz: ...he's going to do whatever you want him to do for the next twenty minutes.

Megane 6.7: <Dave> My friends and I were rescuing a cheerleader from a mad scientist and his family...

Megane 6.7: <Dave> ...in a MUCH BETTER game.

<Zoogz> I'm guessing Dave wasn't issued a weapon since Les is still conscious and breathing.

Zoogz: Deeeeep... like the bottom of a 'Skoal' can.

Kizzy Caspy: Thanks, "Tips".

Megane 6.7: WHAT busy streets? It's like a tomb out here!

Megane 6.7: Hell, even the music's buggered off!

Kizzy Caspy: Oop... and music's back from the restroom.

Zoogz: The Bus Station. Everyone's last resort for sixty years and counting.

Megane 6.7: Get an animation. Oh sorry, YOURS only works from the OUTSIDE...

Zoogz: He's got a job, madam... he works across the street...

Zoogz: No, not at the Starbucks...

Zoogz: No, not at that Starbucks either.

Zoogz: <child's voice> Look, mother, I'm playing right now! I'll come for dinner in ten minutes!

Zoogz: So all women are either out of Playboy central casting or generic "mom" characters. Got it.

Megane 6.7: Why not just cast MILFs? Then you'll have the best of both worlds!

Zoogz: (pained) Stop it... trying to get through this one without the bile rising.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Hey Father, would you mind blessing my quest to...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> ...oh, shoot.

(Leisure Suit Larry 2 Point Noise FX)

Kizzy Caspy: Do the leash laws apply to soundtracks?

Zoogz: Either way the shit wafts strongly in the air.

<Guybrush Threepwood> Oooh, a circus!

<Guybrush Threepwood> I love a circus!

Megane 6.7: Gaaah! MIDI Circus music!

Kizzy Caspy: Nice, AD-LIB, Meg.

Zoogz: (Groans)

Zoogz: Sounds like a 'Blue Man Group' production.

Megane 6.7: And suddenly this is the best circus ever.

Kizzy Caspy: Finally... I can throw my balls in peace.

Kizzy Caspy: Oh, come on! We're already inside!

Kizzy Caspy: Who's going to know? Even Clownie here doesn't give a shit!

Zoogz: A late-model Gulfstream?

Zoogz: There's meth cooking around here somewhere!

Kizzy Caspy: What is with the freaking music!?

Kizzy Caspy: Start, stop... start, stop!?

Kizzy Caspy: Come on, soundtrack, are you going to participate in this game or not?

Megane 6.7: You realize you're actually DEMANDING the return of CIRCUS music?

Kizzy Caspy: Shit, you're right...

Kizzy Caspy: What's WRONG with me??

Zoogz: Though that trailer is definitely not a-rockin.

Megane 6.7: (shudders) Thank the Lord.

Zoogz: At least you know for a fact they're not Amish.

Kizzy Caspy: Does he know he's an NPC doomed to have only a couple lines in an old game?

Megane 6.7: (pleading) Please be human, please be human, please be human...

Megane 6.7: Oh, thank God...

Megane 6.7: It's only a stereotype.

Zoogz: When did Foghorn Leghorn fall into the Spring of Drowned Man?

(Zipper being opened FX)

Megane 6.7: NOOOOOOOO...!!

Megane 6.7: Nah, I'm just foolin'.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Or at least score some leftover candy floss.

Megane 6.7: <Col. Bob> Y'all realize it's comin' off the ground?

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Still more hygenic than the serving stall, I assure you.

Kizzy Caspy: Personally, I think he's better off with some professional "hep".

Megane 6.7: <Col. Bob as Yoda> Try? Yew say, TRY!?

Megane 6.7: <Col. Bob as Yoda> Boy... Ah say... boy...

Megane 6.7: <Col. Bob as Yoda> Y'all do or y'all do not...

Megane 6.7: <Col. Bob as Yoda> Thare ain't no tryin'. Nosiree, Bob.

Megane 6.7: <Col. Bob> Oww! Mah arm!

Zoogz: Star Wars wipe!

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, the special edition of this game has CGI elephants...

Kizzy Caspy: ...and Jar Jar slipping on their poop.

Kizzy Caspy: Is this a comedy or a case study in clinical depression?

Megane 6.7: Come to the Circus of Despair! Free Paxil and Booze for Mom!

Zoogz: Where all the balloons have frowny faces that are more depressing than the clowns!

Kizzy Caspy: You'll never smell ANYTHING like it again!

Zoogz: Complimentary calls to the suicide hotline!

Zoogz: Even Barnum and Bailey found it too morbid!

Megane 6.7: (chuckling) Hokay, that's enough.

Kizzy Caspy: (whispering) Meet us in Arlington later...

Kizzy Caspy: (whispering) We'll leave a parking garage open for you...

Kizzy Caspy: (whispering) Ask for Deep Trunk.

('Stable Work Melody' from 'Quest for Glory'' plays briefly)

Megane 6.7: Whew! I'm exhausted!

Zoogz: And now Col. Bob has to go back to teaching ESL for Asian kids by teleconference.

Megane 6.7: <Col. Bob> Sumbitch! That smarts!

Kizzy Caspy: Hey, screw the circus...

Kizzy Caspy: Let's go see 'Dirty Dancing' instead!

Megane 6.7: (singing) Well yes, they call him the Geek...!

Megane 6.7: (singing) ...fastest thing on two feet...!

Kizzy Caspy: Zarmooska? Sounds like a fishing village in Canada.

Megane 6.7: Or Bullwinkle in drag.

Zoogz: I wonder if she saw herself working for Col. Bob many years ago...

Megane 6.7: Heh, doubt it.

Kizzy Caspy: Ball reading? She's a urologist on the side?

Zoogz: I'm not sure I'd want a ball reading from someone who can't even...

Zoogz: ...position her font on her trailer correctly.

Megane 6.7: Palm Jobs are great though...

Megane 6.7: ...cause no matter how bleak your future looks...

Megane 6.7: ...you're always guaranteed a "Happy Ending".

Zoogz: I bet Madame Zarnooska doesn't even travel with the circus...

Zoogz: Col. Bob just visits the local trailer park in advance and picks one of the many...

Zoogz: ..."gifted" individuals who live there no matter the city.

Kizzy Caspy: THAT would explain half of the people cast for reality TV.

Megane 6.7: And the other half that watch them.

Kizzy Caspy: Which is on loan? Mme. Zarmoska...?

Kizzy Caspy: ...or the full wet lips?

Megane 6.7: You know? Palm Jobs?

Megane 6.7: Your OWN FUCKING JOKE?

Megane 6.7: Geez...

Megane 6.7: Well, I guess that's tru... wait, WHAT?

Zoogz: (sighs) And the cake is a lie, we know! GET ON WITH IT!

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> Priscilla has no idea about us...

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> ...and he's going to leave her... any day now!

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> I tried living in Hollywood... but it was too creepy and weird.

Zoogz: Straight out of central casting, aren't you?

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> Not "The Longest Journey" though...

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> ...that's a different game.

Zoogz: Again? 'Journey', remember?

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme.Zarmooska> ...and seizure!

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> Better not go home for a while, Les.

Zoogz: No, it's a search on Google to find a walkthrough.

Zoogz: Of... hearts?

Megane 6.7: Sooo... which orb should I be staring at...?

Megane 6.7: The one with a face in it...?

Megane 6.7: Or the two slightly above?

<Homer Simpson> I've made my choice.

Zoogz: Okay, he's right there. Game over.

Megane 6.7: Check. Your move, Kingy.

Kizzy Caspy: First Leisure Suit Larry, now King Graham...?

Kizzy Caspy: Is Sierra even aware their characters are moonlighting?

<Shao Khan> FATALITY!

Zoogz: Yeah, if I had to ask the same question five times I'd get pissed answering it constantly too.

Zoogz: Make that SIX times...

Megane 6.7: Maybe her secretary REALLY sucks at taking dictation?

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> And the WEED...

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> LOTS... of the weed.

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> Forget 'Rocky V'! 'Rocky BALBOA' will save the franchise!

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> Trust me, darling...

Zoogz: Perhaps you can use the next "Type Something" box to say "PUNCH IN FACE".

Megane 6.7: (typing on keyboard) DEMAND... THE... LAST...

Megane 6.7: (typing on keyboard) ...SIXTY... SECONDS... OF...

Megane 6.7: (typing on keyboard) ...YOUR... LIFE... BACK!

Megane 6.7: Or... a new light fixture!

Zoogz: Or the last person who wanted his future foretold.

Zoogz: Well, that was a pointless cul-de-sac...

Zoogz: ...and she never gave Les a palm job.

Megane 6.7: Yeah, what a gyp...

Megane 6.7: ...sy.

Kizzy Caspy: (groans)

Megane 6.7: Luigi Pastrami, a name only slightly less eye-rolling than Nintendo Punch-Out's...

Megane 6.7: ...'Pizza Pasta'.

Zoogz: "Look man, really?"

Megane 6.7: Auguste Rodin's... "The Blinker".

Zoogz: He just came from the fortune teller's tent too.

Kizzy Caspy: Geez, is there anyone who's NOT depressed in this game?

Kizzy Caspy: Probably that time of the month...

Megane 6.7: <Luigi> I still haven't found-a Mario!

Megane 6.7: <Luigi> What am I gonna tell-a the Princess?

Megane 6.7: <Luigi> Assuming I ever find-a the right castle...

Zoogz: Hey, she's the one offering the palm jobs!!

Zoogz: Well, they're both two-dimensional...

Kizzy Caspy: Ahhh, so he's an escort.

Megane 6.7: Too many Pringles, man.

Megane 6.7: Heyyy, it's Helmut!

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> The Tiny Little Superguy!

Zoogz: He needs to find an MTV show to be a mascot for.

Zoogz: Does that mean that he'll only respond in German as well?

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Volkswagen, Das Auto?

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> The clown groupies weren't nearly as fun as advertised.

Zoogz: Other than being a spokes-shrimp for Wonkavision?

Megane 6.7: Like a 'Twilight' movie.

Zoogz: Coming from a tiny man who would drown in a doggie bowl?

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, but I'm bigger and can stuff him in my pocket...

Kizzy Caspy: ...until he submits to my will.

Megane 6.7: Yikes...

Megane 6.7: Oh, she's a opera star!

Megane 6.7: Can I request some 'Habanera' from 'Carmen' please?

Kizzy Caspy: No, but she can belch out an Aria if you'd like.

Zoogz: I feel like he would have wasted just as much time by talking to the elephants.

Megane 6.7: Pretty sure his nose would've disagreed.

Kizzy Caspy: So this Circus has the World's Tallest, World's Smallest and World's Strongest Man...

Kizzy Caspy: ...but only the World's Fattest Woman?

Megane 6.7: Yeah, at least give us a bearded lady!

Zoogz: She probably has one.

Kizzy Caspy: I think you're missing my point.

Zoogz: Does "World's Fattest Woman with a Milk Mustache" count?

Kizzy Caspy: (sighs)

Megane 6.7: 'Circus Entrance?'

Megane 6.7: What the hell was all that stuff we just walked through?

Megane 6.7: 'The Freak Fleamarket'?

Zoogz: And we're super-sure that Col. Bob isn't selling used cars under that tent?

Zoogz: If a bell rings and no dude bros are around to hear the sound...

Zoogz: ...are you really strong?

Megane 6.7: And next... the peanuts!

Zoogz: Finally, something to make the elephants talk.

Kizzy Caspy: <Old Timey Detective> I know you witnessed the murder...!

Kizzy Caspy: <Old Timey Detective> Don't play Dumbo with me...!

Kizzy Caspy: <Old Timey Detective> An elephant NEVER forgets!

Zoogz: Ahh, so THIS is where all the ticket buyers went.

Megane 6.7: Come for the air conditioning. Stay for the...

Megane 6.7: ...air conditioning.

Zoogz: I hope you're taking notes, Pixar.

Kizzy Caspy: Holy crap...

Kizzy Caspy: He's a lion whisperer?

Zoogz: (whispering) Your cat is calling out to you...

Zoogz: (whispering) He wants.... FOOD...

Zoogz: (whispering) Then, sunlight to sleep in.

Megane 6.7: First time someone's ever thought of Les as a piece of meat.

Megane 6.7: Yeah, be sure to get a running start before mauling the 98 pound weakling...

Megane 6.7: There you go.

Kizzy Caspy: So death is biting into an expired hot dog?

Kizzy Caspy: Interesting interpetation...

Megane 6.7: Behold the pale horseradish...

Megane 6.7: The weiner that sat upon it was Death...

Megane 6.7: ...and halitosis followed with it.

(Teleportation FX)

Megane 6.7: <Director> Les Manley wanders aimlessly into Circus Tent, Take Two! *clap fx*

Zoogz: What meat is that lion seeing anyway?

Kizzy Caspy: Extra lean, soon to be ground beef.

Megane 6.7: You'd think the Lion would have the same concern about him.

Zoogz: Because lions love popcorn??

Megane 6.7: Shitty writing saves the day!

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, fuck the lion tamer dream...

Kizzy Caspy: THIS plot contrivance is what doesn't fit into the storyline!

Zoogz: Sure thing, Obi-wan.

Zoogz: That you seem to wander into!!

Megane 6.7: Yeah, the mediocre shit's outside getting sunburned with the freak show.

Zoogz: Thank goodness it wasn't from a '-stan'.

Kizzy Caspy: I suppose that's better than helping Madam Zarmooska out with the palm jobs.

Megane 6.7: Alona against the world...

Zoogz: Her B.A. in Polish Literature isn't good enough for the narrator.

Megane 6.7: Kinda like this dialogue.

Kizzy Caspy: <Alona> Shut the hell up spectator, we'll be on in a couple seconds!

Kizzy Caspy: Makes it easy on HR.

Zoogz: German "von", Russian "ov", French "Englaise"...

Zoogz: It's proof the developers think that Europe is a foreign country.

Megane 6.7: I'm guessing our lovely narrator must be from one of those '-ed' states.

Megane 6.7: Fred knows the circus cares as much for his safety as they do for his culture.

Kizzy Caspy: The rungs get wider and more diagonal the further they go up...

Kizzy Caspy: ...almost as if somebody didn't know how to draw perspective...

Kizzy Caspy: ...AT ALL.

Zoogz: Ohh, the player wanted to feel Alona's funbags first...

Megane 6.7: (chuckling) Heh, shut up.

Megane 6.7: If only Roy had kept some popcorn on hand...

Megane 6.7: ...he could be performing with Zeigfried to this day.

Kizzy Caspy: Not like when you wandered on-stage into the middle of a LION TAMER'S act!

Megane 6.7: What the...!?

Zoogz: Holy crap, someone nuked Santa Fe!?

(The epilogue music from ''Fallout Las Vegas' starts playing.)

Megane 6.7: Nah, we're just screwing with ya.

Megane 6.7: See? Les is just fine!

Megane 6.7: Wait, what?

Kizzy Caspy: And any small hint of plausibility just burned up in the atmosphere.

Zoogz: Does he land on the planet of the Metroids next?

Kizzy Caspy: Should've stocked up on ACME products, Les...

Kizzy Caspy: You'll never catch the Road Runner now.

Zoogz: The Undertaker approves.

(Funeral Gong FX)

Zoogz: Dammit! Why won't that groundhog DIE?!

Zoogz: So Luigi is his psychiatrist too?

Megane 6.7: <Luigi> Tell-a me about-a your mama....

Zoogz: Especially if the Cowboys cover against the Patriots.

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, right, and the Cubs might win the World...

Kizzy Caspy: ...oh crap, can't use that joke anymore.

Megane 6.7: Yeah, the future isn't what it used to be.

Kizzy Caspy: What kind of nerd says that?

Megane 6.7: Uhhh...

Megane 6.7: (Relieved) Oh, thank God.

Zoogz: This looks like the street where Kuni throws people out of windows...

<Kuni> STUPIDDDD!!!

Zoogz: Yeah, someone probably put a bullet through its crankcase on its trip back from Jersey.

Kizzy Caspy: It just won't die.

Zoogz: Hey, it's the steps from '227'!

Kizzy Caspy: <singing> Mmm hmm... times are changin'... everyday...

Kizzy Caspy: <signing> We won't get by with those same old ways...

All: <singing> No-o... No!

Megane 6.7: Ahh, fun.

Zoogz: Or a sponge.

Zoogz: Knocking on the door activates the doorbell? How quaint.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Detective Manley! NYPD! O-Open up!

(Zipper FX)

Zoogz: Someone dressed this set right after their day job on 'Happy Days'.

Kizzy Caspy: Is the hole in the wall a real architectural feature?

Megane 6.7: Apparently.

Megane 6.7: What's even sadder? Those pictures came with the frames when she bought them.

Kizzy Caspy: Therapy?

Megane 6.7: Wait, is she Thelma or Louise? I always get those two mixed up.

Megane 6.7: And totally not a woman's vagina. No wayyy...

Zoogz: She worships a sweaty scarf?

Zoogz: What's her bible? A wet mitten?

Zoogz: Yeah, look woman...

Zoogz: ...you totally need a new scarf.

Kizzy Caspy: Or so Carla Hall keeps telling us.

Megane 6.7: Sure, take a load off, Les. We'll wait till you get a clue...

Megane 6.7: ...no pressure.

Kizzy Caspy: (chuckles) I love how Les is just looking at us as if to say "Well? Now what?"

Zoogz: He died from a lack of good taste.

Kizzy Caspy: And I'll bet you didn't know THE KING also fractured...

Kizzy Caspy: ...Catholicism off into his own branch of religion so he could divorce his wife and...

Kizzy Caspy: ...oh sorry, wrong King again.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Oh really? Can it cure the clap? That would be really helpful to...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> ...a friend.

Kizzy Caspy: <Bobbi> I need it BAD, honey...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Well, with me, baby... it's guaranteed to be bad.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> That almost NEVER EVER happens!

Zoogz: What story would you think they're chasing anyway?

Megane 6.7: Tiananmen Square?

Zoogz: Ouch.

Kizzy Caspy: <Bobbi> ...in a Pee Wee Herman hooked up with Barney Fife...

Kizzy Caspy: <Bobbi> ...and had an angry threesome with Nicolas Cage sort of way...

Kizzy Caspy: Seriously... Les is looking at the player like...

Kizzy Caspy: HELP...MEEEE...!!

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Ohh, you're going to kill me after we mate, aren't you?

Zoogz: Ask about the horrible couch!

Zoogz: So that's how you get her to shut up.

Megane 6.7: Bobbi doesn't like to talk about herself...

Megane 6.7: ...just about EVERYTHING ELSE.

Zoogz: You have to ask for an alcohol.

Zoogz: Would you have some fluid, kind miss?

Kizzy Caspy: <Bobbi> You want to try a vial of his sweat? It's REALLY delish!

Megane 6.7: Ah yes, SODA... how stupid of us not to realize THAT was the proper phrasing.

Kizzy Caspy: She scurries like Peg Bundy.

Zoogz: Well, it just kind of lays there.

Kizzy Caspy: <Bobbi> Mm, just like my last three husbands.

Zoogz: Well that's a dick move....

Megane 6.7: Les heard soda helps get out stains...

Megane 6.7: ...unfortunately, he was thinking of CLUB soda...

Zoogz: Va-moos?

Megane 6.7: Yeah, that's Cow for "Get the fuck out".

Megane 6.7: "Mew" at Work?

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah right, he's probably just bouncing around on a pink bubble as usual...

Kizzy Caspy: God, I envy him.

Zoogz: Huh? That's a shitty washing machine.

Megane 6.7: She didn't just forget the fabric softener, she forgot the detergent!

Zoogz: Recalling? Les was using them... just last week.

Zoogz: Naw, he'll think of Bobbi and put other stains on it.

Kizzy Caspy: Classy.

Megane 6.7: But likely.

Zoogz: This cheap production can't reverse the video? Whaaaa?

Kizzy Caspy: They must've blown the budget on that reverse angle shot in the bus station.

Zoogz: And Les is walking about town much like an urban Paul Hogan.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Ohh, that's not a bow tie...

(Spinning Novelty Bow Tie FX)

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> THAT'S a bow tie!

Megane 6.7: Another letter!? Man, e-mail can't come fast enough for this guy!

Megane 6.7: Meanwhile, Monkey Man continues to sleep at his post.

Zoogz: In this case, I don't want to see his dirty clothes pile at the end of the week.

(Psycho-esque music plays briefly)

Kizzy Caspy: Oh yeah, cause THAT's what you want your security guard dreaming about.

(Leisure Suit Larry 2 Point Noise FX)

Kizzy Caspy: Pffft! Some security guard, can't even guard his own dreams!

Megane 6.7: Seriously, though, if anyone out there who's played this game figured out that dream puzzle...

Megane 6.7: ...without using a walkthrough or buying the hintbook...

Megane 6.7: ...congratulations and welcome to our planet.

Zoogz: Annnnd another letter.

Kizzy Caspy: Think we could ditch Les and find out what THAT guy's deal is instead?

(Leisure Suit Larry 2 Point Noise FX)

Kizzy Caspy: OK, programmers, if you're gonna keep sneaking Larry into your game...

Kizzy Caspy: ...at least give him a credit at the end.

Megane 6.7: Or a box lunch for the extra work.

Zoogz: You're now a firefighter...

Zoogz: ...on MARS!!

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> Ice cream... luxury vacations...

(Psycho-esque music plays briefly)

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> Whoa, wait a minute! I don't want a severed head!

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> MOMMYYY!!!

Megane 6.7: And like all new friends, it's time to stuff him down our shorts.

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, I don't think LES MANLEY needs to be reminded of that.

Zoogz: Can't tell which one should stay at the circus more, Les or Helmut.

Zoogz: Why are we gossiping with Madame Zarmooska again?

Kizzy Caspy: For an excuse to stare at her... hands?

Megane 6.7: More like claws, look at those things... yikes!

Kizzy Caspy: Makes you reconsider the whole palm job thing, huh?

Megane 6.7: <chuckling> Yeah, really.

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> Especially when we run out of batteries.

Megane 6.7: Wait, why does Helmut want to leave again?

Zoogz: Are we sure that Helmut isn't dancing on top of the synthesizer in order to make the music?

Kizzy Caspy: <Mme. Zarmooska> Why, he probably thinks this game is all about him!

Megane 6.7: And if the lizard was a IBM, that would make sense.

Zoogz: Maybe he's just an elaborate USB Drive?

Megane 6.7: <Homer Simpson> Mmm... Doughnut Glaze...

(Homer Simpson Drooling FX)

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> So I might get to have relations with her and...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> ...C-C-C-COPULATE!?

Zoogz: Well, we can't obviously swipe the wax while she's still here...

Zoogz: So let's throw caution and decency to the wind and invade her personal space.

Megane 6.7: Suddenly, you hear a muffled sob coming from deep inside your pocket as a tiny voice cries out...

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> "I could've had HER!? DAMN YOU, LES!"

Kizzy Caspy: Actually, it sounded more like...

Kizzy Caspy: <Helmut, muffled> "Mmmph! Mmmph mmmph mmmph!"

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Huh, usually they don't disappear until after I...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Well, shoot!

Megane 6.7: Either Les prefers lotion or he doesn't believe in tissues.

Kizzy Caspy: Either way, Eww.

Kizzy Caspy: Oops, didn't mean to trigger you there, lil' buddy.

Zoogz: Thank goodness it's a lizard and not a snake with an eyepatch.

Zoogz: Oh... the lizard has his own law office.

Megane 6.7: Nice business card dispenser!

Megane 6.7: Seriously, I want one of those for my office!

Megane 6.7: Just like any M. Night Shamalayn film made before 1999.

Zoogz: Before 1999? At this rate, indefinitely.

Kizzy Caspy: Kinda assumed that's what the LOAD button was for, but... okay...

Megane 6.7: She wasn't carved from marble, she IS a marble!

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, she only badly cosplays as a human being.

(Music and Sound FX from 'LOOM' play briefly)

Megane 6.7: <Luigi> And-a resume shaming all-a Italians everywhere with my-a horrible-a accent...AHHHH!!

Kizzy Caspy: Now he looks more like a 70's porn star!

Zoogz: Where it will meld with the wax, making your pants into a dry cleaner's wet dream.

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> Dream? Did someone say dream?

Kizzy Caspy: Back in the pocket, Helmut.

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> Aww...

Megane 6.7: Gotta say, that is one patient crowd.

Zoogz: So the rosin will make him fall faster?

Megane 6.7: Yep.

Kizzy Caspy: Oh man, he didn't catch the Road Runner.

Megane 6.7: <loudspeakers> Whoops, sorry folks. Looks like Fred opted for a death-EMBRACING leap...

Megane 6.7: <Loudspeakers> The management apologizes for any trauma you and your family have just suffered...

Megane 6.7: <Loudspeakers> ...and wish to remind you that are no refunds.

Megane 6.7: Except a whole lot squishier.

Kizzy Caspy: <Baby Plucky Duck> Fred go down the hoooooole...

Zoogz: I don't think Fred's assistance will come through the help screen.

Megane 6.7: Hey, at least the player tried.

Kizzy Caspy: What's that? Fred's family wants to bury the cape with his body?

Kizzy Caspy: Well, we've, uh, got a KING to find so you can go pound sand, next of kin!

Zoogz: She seems to be cheering on the inside.

Megane 6.7: Yeah, this adventure's sorry enough as it is.

Zoogz: Oh, using hammer launch again?

Kizzy Caspy: 'Super Mario World' totally ripped that off for their warp cannon schtick.

Megane 6.7: Uh-oh, looks like Gamera's had a few too many...

Megane 6.7: Heads up, America! He's going down!

(Various Gamera Noises FX)

Zoogz: So if Les gets out of this hole, that means that the dickhead at the circus is fine.

Zoogz: Dammit.

Kizzy Caspy: And yet Les here was Manley enough to survive intact. Go figure.

Megane 6.7: Les's mother must've dipped him in the River Stix when he was a baby...

Megane 6.7: ...only his left heel suffered third degree burns.

(Funeral Gong FX)

Kizzy Caspy: Oops, another letter! How many is that now?

Megane 6.7: This is how old people tweeted before 'Twitter' was invented.

Megane 6.7: Where exactly TO is immaterial.

Zoogz: And then Les was immediately arrested for human trafficking.

Zoogz: Back to the circus? Must we?

Kizzy Caspy: (pained) Oh please, no more! The circus music eats my soul!

Megane 6.7: Last time, I promise.

Kizzy Caspy: (annoyed) The game is actually chastizing us...

Kizzy Caspy: ...for not predicting its own insanity.

Megane 6.7: (pained) Uhhh... I feel like Martian Manhunter after diving into the Joker's brain...

Megane 6.7: <Airplane Pilot> And on your right, you can see Canada in all it's glory, uhhhhhhh...

Zoogz: If only he was launched from Moncton! Then the dude could have literally said...

Zoogz: ..."Take off!" and he would've been right!

Kizzy Caspy: Yeaaaah! We're FINALLY done with the circus!

Megane 6.7: Not only that, no follow up message!

Megane 6.7: We've successfully beaten the dead ends...

Megane 6.7: well, up to this point in the game, anyway.

Megane 6.7: And yet Helmut still BEAT him here.

Megane 6.7: That's some Ludicrious Speed Postal Service right there.

Zoogz: Why didn't you just mail YOURSELF originally, Les?

Megane 6.7: Obviously, Les prefers Airmail.

(Drum Fill FX)

Zoogz: Left is Hollywood and right is Phoenix?

Megane 6.7: Or was it the other way around? Eh, hell with it.

Zoogz: So Les will build Las Vegas by himself?

Kizzy Caspy: No, he'll get help from that buzzard and Helmut too.

Megane 6.7: Unless the buzzard eats Helmut.

Zoogz: The phone's ringing? Is it E.T.?

Kizzy Caspy: Maybe it's the producer telling Les the game's been cancelled.

Megane 6.7: If it's a telemarketer, I'm officially quitting this life.

Megane 6.7: <Yakko> Helllllll-o, Nurse!

Zoogz: Huh, I don't remember ordering cheesecake?

Kizzy Caspy: <Stella> I've been reduced to hawking a 1-976 line...

Kizzy Caspy: <Stella> Isn't that terrible, Les?

Kizzy Caspy: <Stella> Les? Are you still there?

Kizzy Caspy: <Stella> What's that weird rubbing sound?

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley, moaning> OHH OHH OHH...!!

Megane 6.7: Nothing like being honest.

Kizzy Caspy: <Stella> And he couldn't afford a writer to fit me into the story? What a goof!

Megane 6.7: Sadly, he doesn't have $2.99 for the first three seconds, much less the first three minutes...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Ohh, great, now I'm lost AND horny...

<'King's Quest V' Narrator> Ahh, life-giving water! Nectar of the Gods!

Megane 6.7: And through the Neverland Ranch we walk...

Zoogz: ...out past the Manson family...

Zoogz: ...wave "hi" to the builders getting that wall up for Trump now!

Zoogz: Don't trip in the Les hole, Les.

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah Les, don't be a Leshole.

Zoogz: Oh, Las Vegas was already built.

Kizzy Caspy: Just the one hotel so far...

Kizzy Caspy: ...they've got a LOOOONG way to go.

Megane 6.7: Cause women are never broken, just... sexually available?

Zoogz: Transportation except a thumb?

Zoogz: Oh, you mean the Uber drivers?

Megane 6.7: Gee...I dunno, what are the odds of finding someone dressed like Elvis in Las Vegas?

Zoogz: They're usually dropping out of the sky.

Kizzy Caspy: Ooh, easy...

Kizzy Caspy: ...Les is still sensitive about that.

Megane 6.7: <Smash T.V. Announcer> BIG LOBBY! BIG PRIZES! I LOVE IT!

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Hey, Bernardo...

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Could you dress up as the King so I can defraud my workplace and bag us a cool mil?

Kizzy Caspy: Hey look, it's Wilford Brimley with the Doublemint twins!

Zoogz: Yeah, you called him "Man". He's.... BAH-NARRRRDO!

Zoogz: Champion of the Customer Service Desk!!!

('El Pollo Diablo's Theme' Plays Briefly)

Megane 6.7: Then he shot the television and was asked to leave.

Zoogz: Aww crap Les, get out of there before either James Caan or Josh Duhamel shows up!

Kizzy Caspy: Good call.

Zoogz: Turn it instantly red like the world's nerdiest stoplight?

Megane 6.7: Yikes, I think we just wandered into the Villa of the Giants!

Zoogz: Thought it was the Dwelling of the Douchebags.

Zoogz: Umm... "Schindler's List", "Shawshank Redemption", and "Benji Comes Home".

Megane 6.7: Man, that Benji was one hot.... dog.

Megane 6.7: Aww man, can't I even get a ba-dum chik for that?

Kizzy Caspy: <threateningly, under her breath> I'll give you a ba-dum chik...

Megane 6.7: Mr. Fabulous? The horn player from the Blues Brothers?

Megane 6.7: That's an... odd casting choice.

Zoogz: I think that being a bit player in a 'Les Manley' game will be your ABSOLUTE BEST ROLE in LIFE.

Kizzy Caspy: Basking in Mr. Fabulous's presence, sure...

Kizzy Caspy: ...but TALKING to him, now you've done it!

Zoogz: <singing> Momma had a Les and his head popped off!

Megane 6.7: Well at least Les can cosplay as a broken C-3PO backpack now...

Megane 6.7: Huh, I guess that one free resurrection card we stole from Mme. Zarmooska...

Megane 6.7: ...burned up in the atmosphere too?

Kizzy Caspy: Or more likely the designers forgot about it and hoped you would too.

Megane 6.7: Terrific.

('Hallelujah' Chorus from 'Star Control II' plays briefly)

Zoogz: Tell him that Steven Spielburg's on the phone...

Zoogz: ...for 'Schindler's List 2'.

Megane 6.7: <Bernardo> Fine, fine!

Megane 6.7: <Bernardo> I'll put one of our guests in possible danger from a total stranger...!

Megane 6.7: <Bernardo> ...who LITERALLY walked in from the desert...!

Megane 6.7: <Bernardo> ...if you'll just SHUT UP already!!

Zoogz: <Hotel Operator> And listen, Betty...

Zoogz: <Hotel Operator>...don't start up with your white zone shit again.

Megane 6.7: <Mr. Fabulous> Jake? Elwood? Never heard of 'em!

Zoogz: As opposed to the umbrella.

Zoogz: Next time just bring her a mojito first.

Zoogz: Drink in a looooong look at the 80s, my friends.

Megane 6.7: Free refills for everybody.

Kizzy Caspy: Why is her nose sinking into her face?

Kizzy Caspy: And is her right cheek swelling up?

Megane 6.7: Nipple... sorry, what?

Kizzy Caspy: Despite calling you a wimp no less than TEN SECONDS ago...!

Kizzy Caspy: COME ON, game!

Megane 6.7: Like... lounge in a pool chair?

Kizzy Caspy: From horrid to horny in under thirty seconds.

Megane 6.7: Spill a soda on her...

Megane 6.7: NO, WAIT! Bad idea!

Zoogz: Seriously, either Lyla's seven feet tall or Les is four foot short.

Megane 6.7: And once again Les drops the ball with a woman.

Kizzy Caspy: At this point, I'm wondering if he's dropped his balls, *period*.

Kizzy Caspy: You mean Vito? Hey, what happened to him, anyway?

Megane 6.7: Oh, don't worry. Plot contrivance #12 took care of him.

Kizzy Caspy: Hm.

Zoogz: Goofball's still on the phone wondering who "Mike Rotch" is.

Megane 6.7: <Bernardo> Uh, sir? Sir? You can't just wander through our hotel without a...

Megane 6.7: <Bernardo> ah, screw it.

Zoogz: What's the deal with the farty music anyway?

Kizzy Caspy: Oh man, is Wayne Newton 'backed-up' again?

Megane 6.7: Oh, looks like Ed Grimley finally got a makeover.

Kizzy Caspy: Considering Lyla Libido got horny for a geek like Les...

Kizzy Caspy: I find her taste in men "questionable" at best.

Zoogz: No... push ALL the buttons!

Megane 6.7: Ahh! Not THAT one! Push it again! Push it again!

Megane 6.7: Whew!

Megane 6.7: Man, remind me never to stay here...

Megane 6.7: Security isn't just a joke, it's non-existant!

Zoogz: To be fair, all casinos WANT random idiots wandering the game floor at least.

Zoogz: A veritable feast compared to the sweathogs around the pool.

Zoogz: Love how the game is a smart-ass to you if you don't include the word "in".

Kizzy Caspy: Dammit game, he's looking ON the cart!

Kizzy Caspy: Go screw yourself and your bad grammar!

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Wow, free towels! Score!

Zoogz: What maid? I didn't see another sexy woman in all her 80s glory.

Megane 6.7: Uh-oh... looks like Les has somehow driven another woman into a fit of uncontrollable lust.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Gee...this new aftershave really works!

Zoogz: Dust bunnies killed her parents during the coup.

Kizzy Caspy: <Announcer on TV> Mr. Fabulous has injured himself having another thought again.

Kizzy Caspy: <Announcer on TV> He remains in stable condition at Our Lady of Mercy Hospital.

Zoogz: Wait... didn't Les get the memo from WILL that...

Zoogz: ...employees of the station aren't eligible to participate?"

('Super Mario Brothers' Game Over Music plays briefly.)

Megane 6.7: Wait, wait, wait, wait...

Megane 6.7: He was too busy mentally undressing Stella to notice such an important detail.

Megane 6.7: Game's still on, people!

Kizzy Caspy: You've never heard a grown man say the words 'Boy' and 'Y'all'...

Kizzy Caspy: ...so many times in a single rant.

Megane 6.7: Especially when the Ken doll didn't fool the circus-goers.

Zoogz: <Donald Trump on TV> AND WE WILL CONTINUE TO WIN BIGLY!!

Kizzy Caspy: <Announcer on TV> Please stay tuned after the speech for the Opposition Response...

Kizzy Caspy: <Announcer on TV> ...provided by Senate Minority Leader Charlie Sheen.

Megane 6.7: But what about love, Les? Don't forget love.

Megane 6.7: Waste your time more efficiently...

Megane 6.7: ...by playing the rest of this game.

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> It's what I do, baby.

Zoogz: She needs to get on to suppressing the mildew uprising in the tub.

Megane 6.7: No justice for fungus, I see.

Zoogz: For prostitution services - call the front desk.

Kizzy Caspy: Bernardo will take care of you, Les...

Kizzy Caspy: ...in sooo many ways...

Megane 6.7: He already is.

Zoogz: El sign es en drogas.

Kizzy Caspy: We have-o... cocain-o!

Megane 6.7: Bite-o Me-o, por favor.

Zoogz: Mejor ser racista que aprender un idioma.

Megane 6.7: Unless it's a skeleton key, in which case, go nuts.

Zoogz: However, if you don't have a towel you're not a hoopy frood.

Zoogz: Brought to you proudly by the Ford Prefect Society.

Zoogz: The elevator runs on a skeleton key lock?

Zoogz: What are the brakes made of, hopes and dreams?

Megane 6.7: Aye, forsooth verily, m'lord.

Kizzy Caspy: When the game is questioning its own writing...

Kizzy Caspy: ...that's generally not a good sign of things to come.

Kizzy Caspy: Judging by this decor, ebony and ivory DON'T always live in perfect harmony.

Megane 6.7: I guess the music wasn't authorized to be up here either.

Zoogz: So *that's* what's keeping them afloat!

Kizzy Caspy: Heyyyy...!

Zoogz: Sewn by reluctant Filipino Laotians.

Zoogz: Say what you want, but this game knows its audience.

Kizzy Caspy: And never misses a chance to talk down to them.

Zoogz: Er... I mean Bosco and vodka. Yeah!

Zoogz: What do you think this is, 'The Sims'?

Megane 6.7: Not like Les Manley has much to pixelate anyway.

Kizzy Caspy: Oh, by the way, anybody out there need a copy of "Dummies for Dummies"?

Kizzy Caspy: Anyone?

Megane 6.7: Wimpy wrist? With his love life? Doubt it.

Megane 6.7: That's the idea, now Les can have a soak without all the water draining out.

(Funeral Gong FX)

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> Wait! Don't I get a say in this?

Megane 6.7: <Les Manley> Do you want to stop choking on my pocket lint or not!?

Megane 6.7: <Helmut> Dick.

Zoogz: Seriously? Helmut is smaller than a Lego guy?

Megane 6.7: <Helmut, singing sarcastically> Everything is awesome...

Megane 6.7: <Helmut, singing sarcastically> Everything is cool when you're part of a team...

Kizzy Caspy: Ladies and gentlemen, the world's smallest politician.

Megane 6.7: And yet he STILL has bigger hands than Trump!

Kizzy Caspy: <imitating trombone> Wah-wahhhh...

Megane 6.7: And he's brought us all the pubic hair we'll ever need!

Zoogz: <chuckling> Wow, $19.95 back then was like ten thousand dollars!

Kizzy Caspy: Or... about... three million Canadian.

Megane 6.7: So Les reuses his floss?

Zoogz> No, this is worse, he reuses floss thrown down a...

Zoogz: ...hairy hot-tub drain that's been around a sweaty man's midsection.

Megane 6.7: Oh.

(Funeral Gong FX plays in reverse.)

Kizzy Caspy: No wonder the penthouse was quiet...

Kizzy Caspy: ...you have to PAY to not hear music THIS bad.

Zoogz: She wears the damaged shirts. Poor dear doesn't even know how to sew a button.

Zoogz: Or was it grabby? Probably both.

Kizzy Caspy: Hmm? Oh sorry, Susie...

Kizzy Caspy: I was just trying to figure out where your breasts went.

Megane 6.7: Or at least Conrad Birdie.

Zoogz: Cause kings LOOOVE jumpsuits!

Megane 6.7: Now you can be the king AND the court jester!

Kizzy Caspy: With reasoning like that, no wonder she hates men getting ontological.

Zoogz: Wonder how old she was when the suit was first taken in to the cleaners...

Zoogz: And how many other clothes haven't been destroyed in those intervening 20 years?

Megane 6.7: Dude, you're putting more thought into it than the game designers did. Give it a rest.

Megane 6.7: At worst, he'll only get "virtually" molested, murdered and dumped in a ditch.

Zoogz: Holy crap, this is a crossover with "Cars"?

Zoogz: Don't let him in, Fillmore!

Megane 6.7: Call me crazy, but I think Les's lunch break is over by now.

Kizzy Caspy: <Narrator> Sadly, while on route, Les choked to death after trying his first and LAST joint.

Megane 6.7: Almost as well as when Les was the human meteorite.

Zoogz: Couldn't the music have changed in the last 1000 miles at least?

Megane 6.7: Especially when it came to pharmaceuticals.

Kizzy Caspy: Oooohhh...

Megane 6.7: What, is forty years still too soon?

Kizzy Caspy: Call the burn unit.

Zoogz: He flew 2500 miles across the country through the use of a fairground strength tester...

Zoogz: ...but can't get through a crummy gate?

Kizzy Caspy: Just tie Helmut with floss again...

Kizzy Caspy: ...twirl him like a lasso and cast him towards the house!

Megane 6.7: Don't question it! Just do it!

Kizzy Caspy: Enjoy our map, influenced by the gas station diner's paper placemat...

Kizzy Caspy: ...where the majority of this game's plot was hastily conceived...

Kizzy Caspy: ...and scribbled on the back.

Zoogz: Red's Bar and Grill... no better place to sing the Blues.

Megane 6.7: Has a celebrity look-alike contest EVER warranted being held NIGHTLY?

Zoogz: Yeah, it's so bad that you'll get arrested by 'The Police'.

(Drum Fill FX)

Kizzy Caspy: (Sighs) Really?

Kizzy Caspy: Does that even warrant a drum fill?

Zoogz: Warrant! Hah, good one!

Kizzy Caspy: (groans)

Megane 6.7: Before he started changing in Apple stores.

Megane 6.7: This ain't 'Senran Kagura', Les. Only one fan-service call per game.

Zoogz: Can't you get Helmut a white jumpsuit too?

Zoogz: He could be the angel perched on your shoulder.

Megane 6.7: Why, that's brilliant!

Megane 6.7: So no, it'll never happen in this game.

Kizzy Caspy: Uh-oh, the music had one too many beers at Red's Bar...

Kizzy Caspy: Yep, there it goes stumbling around back to...

(Vomiting Sound FX)

Zoogz: <Loudspeaker> And now please welcome to our stage...

Zoogz: <Loudspeaker> Elv-Les Man-ley!

Kizzy Caspy: Well, it hardly seems worth it, but...

Kizzy Caspy: BOOOOOO!!!

Zoogz: Including decades-old celebrities who have had both "fat-" and "skinny" variants?

Kizzy Caspy: Oooo-kay, so why are the MEN in here then?

Megane 6.7: Cheap drinks, air conditioning and a working john.

Zoogz: With neither a song nor a dance actually planned.

Megane 6.7: Or any real reason to be doing this at all.

Kizzy Caspy: If Les could've danced without instructions many years ago, he wouldn't be a nerd now.

Kizzy Caspy: Holy crap, game!

Megane 6.7: Okay, he starts out with the bee's knees...

Megane 6.7: ...walks like an Egyptian, good...

Megane 6.7: ...moves on to Tequila, ooh, risky choice...

Megane 6.7: ...annnd... he's done.

Kizzy Caspy: Hey, gaaaame, you missed an adverb there! See? How do YOU like it?

Zoogz: <Loudspeaker> The first different contestant we've had in... eight months! He wins by default!

Megane 6.7: Justifiable homicide?

Megane 6.7: Okay, I'll admit it... that was a decent joke.

Zoogz: You have a new set of pyjamas for bedtime!

Kizzy Caspy: Les Manley: Search for the Jammies!

Megane 6.7: Plot contrivance number #17! You're up!

Kizzy Caspy: Because buying a ticket or just sneaking in was WAY too convoluted.

Zoogz: Or a minigame involving Helmut picking a lock... ehh, too unbelievable.

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, stealing Elvis's clothes and humiliating yourself in public was far more plausible.

Zoogz: How come the "Kingdom" looks like a cheap motel?

Kizzy Caspy: Seriously, The King of Town's estate was more impressive.

Zoogz: Vladimir Putin's summer dacha.

Zoogz: This is what happens when you give a southern boy money.

Megane 6.7: Now now, don't be cruel...

Zoogz: (groans)

Megane 6.7: But mostly financial reasons and avoiding MORE financial reasons.

Zoogz: The lawyers have only BEGUN to remove the existence of this game.

Kizzy Caspy: Good lord!

Kizzy Caspy: Who carpeted this room...?

Kizzy Caspy: ...and why haven't the authorities been called on them?

Megane67: The local Fat Men's Club must meet here on weekends.

Megane 6.7: <singing> Sittt uppp, all fat men...

Megane 6.7: <singing> ...sittt uppp straaaight...

Zoogz: Ahh, they placed the banana in here for scale.

Megane 6.7: I don't care! Just open the fucking door already!

Kizzy Caspy: Maybe it's locked or broken...

Megane 6.7: Then SAY SO! Geez...!

Zoogz: I can't quite decide who has the better decorator...

Zoogz: ...the King or... Dr. Kur.

Megane 6.7: Incidentally, all of this will soon be available for auction...

Megane 6.7: ...if tour ticket sales don't improve by next quarter.

Kizzy Caspy: <chuckles> What's with the giant Elvis Suit?

Kizzy Caspy: Was there some sort of failed Umbrella experiment with Tyrant Elvis?

Megane 6.7: <Tyrant Elvis> Itchy... Tasty, baby... Thank you very much for the flesh, baby... uh-huh-huh...

Zoogz: Does it also have a screw loose?

Zoogz: Because there's dozens of highly-armed guards... uhh... somewhere?

Megane 6.7: Well, neither could Chris Brown, but that never stopped him.

Kizzy Caspy: Unfortunately.

Zoogz: What about the furriers?

Zoogz: What about the "Into the Wild" guy who probably wants to see the bears die for what they did?

Megane 6.7: All that does is make the bear growl for a few seconds...

Megane 6.7: ...really not worth the trouble.

Zoogz: Oh for the love of...!

Megane 6.7: First a mailbox, then a hot tub drain and now the insides of a dead bear!

Megane 6.7: Helmut Bean: Livin' the DREAM, baby!

(Balloon inflating FX)

Kizzy Caspy: What the HELL?

Kizzy Caspy: Is Les sucking in his breath or did he suddenly gain fifty pounds?

Zoogz: Shame I can't suspend my disbelief the same way.

Kizzy Caspy: Ahh, now Les can rob the house blind, pawn all the gold and live like a King...

Kizzy Caspy: Wait, this isn't that kind of game...

Kizzy Caspy: ...or is it?

Megane 6.7: If it works for Mariah, it'll work for you.

Zoogz: Along with all the women who have ever been with Les.

Megane 6.7: Because steel strings are for pussies.

Zoogz: Way to be passive-agressive, game.

Megane 6.7: Yeah, save that shit for us Canadians.

Kizzy Caspy: <broad Canadian accent> We'd very much appreciate it, eh? Thanks, bud.

Megane 6.7: And this is where Elvis secretly ran the country during the 1960s...

Megane 6.7: ...yeah, mull THAT one around for a while, conspiracy theorists.

Kizzy Caspy: For the love of Richard...!

Kizzy Caspy: ...DO NOT shine a black light in here!

Megane 6.7: Guaranteed to support the weight of your entire harem.

Kizzy Caspy: Send Helmut in after it!

Zoogz: He's the real hero of this game!

Megane 6.7: True that.

Megane 6.7: A stripper pole? Awesome!

Zoogz: Oh, the KING had a major fetish for firefighters.

Kizzy Caspy: Actually, Les dreamed of being a Ghostbuster...

Kizzy Caspy: ...but he barely qualified for Louis.

Zoogz: Holy crap, is Les a pole dancer?

Megane 6.7: Well, I'm not tipping him.

Zoogz: Or perhaps control-F4?

Zoogz: Because "cease that incessant spinning" was TOO obvious a text command.

Megane 6.7: What, no animation of Les sailing through the wall?

Kizzy Caspy: Dweeb can stop on a dime.

Zoogz: Nor are you as cool as Fonzie.

Kizzy Caspy: Use Helmut!

Kizzy Caspy: Yeah, I'm just gonna keep saying that.

Megane 6.7: At this point, Les could write a book...

Megane 6.7: ..."Touring America on NO dollars a day!"

Zoogz: <Typing on keyboard> MAKE... GRILLED... CHEESE...

Zoogz: Just change "missing" with "here" and remove "soda".

Megane 6.7: Maybe we'll find one of Joel Robinson's inventions?

Kizzy Caspy: Les Manley in... Search for the LOAF.

Zoogz: And two hard-boiled eggs!

(Harpo's Honk FX)

Zoogz: Make that THREE hard-boiled eggs!

Zoogz: The bag is also not closed, so therefore it is ajar too.

Megane 6.7: Whoa... you just blew my mind, man.

Zoogz: So if I opened your MIND, does that mean that it's ajar as well?

Megane 6.7: Duuuuuude...

Kizzy Caspy: (chuckling) S-Stop it before he vapor-locks on us!

Kizzy Caspy: Snap out of it, Meg.

Megane 6.7: Blam Vivalta... W-What? Huh?

Zoogz: Maybe it's Helmut's home. Punch some holes in the lid.

Megane 6.7: Too late.

Kizzy Caspy: Noooooo...!

Megane 6.7: Just kidding!

Kizzy Caspy: (growling) Youuu...!

Kizzy Caspy: (typing angrily on keyboard) SLAP... THE... SHIT...

Kizzy Caspy: (typing angrily on keyboard) ...OUT... OF... PARSER... INTERFACE...!

Zoogz: Indeed, NO ONE should ever make that.

Megane 6.7: (angry) This will be how the computers finally get us...

Megane 6.7: (angry) FUCK Skynet! They'll just use semantics to fuck with our heads!

<Megane 6.7> You're right, I'm sorry...

Megane 6.7: Clearly the best sandwich making area is...

Megane 6.7: ...precisely SIX INCHES TO THE LEFT!!!

Zoogz: A geek's true joy is a sandwich.

Kizzy Caspy: Send Helmut into the jar!

Zoogz: If you want a true Elvis lunch, you need... far more drugs and... fried chicken.

Megane 6.7: Whoops, you forgot to bring the milk, Les! DEAD END!

Kizzy Caspy: (hums a somber dirge)

('Super Mario Brothers' Mushroom Growth Noise FX)

Kizzy Caspy: Yikes! Either Les is severely allergic to bananas...

Kizzy Caspy: ...or eating one sandwich just made him eight months pregnant...!

Megane 6.7: Mel Brooks?

Kizzy Caspy: Friday XIII?

Zoogz: Don?

Zoogz: Now, to the bathroom!

Kizzy Caspy: And there's the full Nicolas Cage mugshot...

Zoogz: <Nicolas Cage> I'd like to take his face... OFF!

Megane 6.7: Les didn't even win 'Best Bow Tie'? Harsh, man...

Megane 6.7: <singing> Mell-ell-ell-ellanie...

Megane 6.7: <singing> ...what can the problem be?

Megane 6.7: <singing> Sweet Mell-ell-ell-ellanie...

Kizzy Caspy: So now that Les is fatter and waving around a guitar like a total spaz...

Kizzy Caspy: ...he's somehow more... Elvis?

Kizzy Caspy: He didn't even style up his hair for fuck's sake!

Zoogz: I feel like he's going to go El Kabong with that thing soon.

Megane 6.7: Boy, if that scarf wasn't sweat-stained *before*...

Kizzy Caspy: <groupie> Eww, this smells like peanut and banana burps...

Kizzy Caspy: It's Evel Knievel!

Megane 6.7: Hey now, that's a horrible insult to Les Manley!

Kizzy Caspy: Sorry.

Zoogz: Aww damn, Les's heart attack is starting!

Zoogz: It's Pigpen's family on their yearly vacation to Texas!

Kizzy Caspy: Auntie Sty! Uncle Boar-regard!

Megane 6.7: Wait, they mobbed him and didn't even take a souvenir?

Zoogz: That's why we can't find Helmut now.

Megane 6.7: And now Les gets to visit another Kingdom...

Megane 6.7: ...assuming they let him in.

Kizzy Caspy: Well, even if his Jesus impression sucks...

Kizzy Caspy: ...he'll still get in with the consolation prize.

Megane 6.7: Good point.

Zoogz: (echoing voice) These are the voyages of Shatner's ego...

Zoogz: (echoing voice) ...boldly exploring new mediums for Shatner to claim as his own...

Zoogz: And behind here... all the douchebags from the hotel pool...

Zoogz: ...they bought their ways in.

Megane 6.7: See, King? THAT'S how you build a gate!

Zoogz: Hey look! Roy Orbison, John Lennon, Buddy Holly...

Zoogz: ...Jimmy Hendrix, Janet Joplin, and... Karen Carpenter, I think?

Megane 6.7: Wonder how many drugged-out rockstars managed to get into heaven?

Kizzy Caspy: Well, as long as they were snorting angel dust at some point.

(Camera snap FX)

Megane 6.7: <Doctor> Thank god!

Megane 6.7: <Doctor> We'll be able to bill him after all.

Zoogz: Does her name tag really read "NAME" or is it just my imagination?

Megane 6.7: Hm? Oh sorry, I wasn't looking at her name tag.

Zoogz: We were rooting for it ourselves.

Megane 6.7: Yeah, that oughta be worth some change for the soda machine.

Kizzy Caspy: Heaven has a one-hour film developer!

Zoogz: Too bad the nurse will win the $1,000,000 now...

Megane67: You'd think Les showing conclusive proof that there's an afterlife would be the bigger...

Megane 6.7: ...story over winning some stupid contest.

Megane 6.7: But hey, what do I know about running a TV station?

<Jon Stewart> WHAT!?

<Jon Stewart> WHAT!?

<Jon Stewart> WHAT!?

<Jon Stewart> WHAT!?

<Jon Stewart> WHAT!?

<Jon Stewart> WOOOOOOOOOOOO-WHAT!?

Kizzy Caspy: <British Accent> Know what I mean, wink wink, nudge nudge?

Zoogz: Say no more.

Megane 6.7: Please.

Zoogz: He's updated his industry from the 1890s to the 1980s!

Zoogz: Let's give him a hand and tell him to NEVER get into mortgage lending.

Kizzy Caspy: The spirit world tunes her into Ellen Degeneres every morning!

Megane 6.7: It was a sweet deal except for the occasional idiot who would...

Megane 6.7: ...shake her ball violently and ask if they'd ever find true love.

Kizzy Caspy: Heyyy, let's hear it for the Teeny Little Superguy!

Megane 6.7: YAYYYYYYY!!! Kizzy Caspy: Woo hoo hoo hoo!

Zoogz: Thank goodness this game had ONE sympathetic almost-protagonist.

Megane 6.7: Fuck no! If eating a banana in this universe makes you fat...

Megane 6.7: ...eating a cheeseburger will probably kill you on the spot!

Kizzy Caspy: But Vito failed to score 50,000 points on 'Double Dragon'...

Kizzy Caspy: ...and was laughed out of the Nintendo World Championships.

Megane 6.7: They broke him like a Virtual Boy.

Zoogz: I'm booked for that ride too, tell me when it gets there!

Megane 6.7: Ah, so she went from one obscure fad... to an even MORE obscure fad. Good, good.

Zoogz: And picking up melanomas by the truckful!

Megane 6.7: Nah, the gigantism got her before the melanoma did.

Zoogz: Les looks like a guy who can't quite make it without support from Viewers Like You.

Kizzy Caspy: I'd tell Les to give Jay Leno back his suit but it seems that Jay's about 125 too big for it now.

Megane 6.7: And back in the shadows... is the director of news, Paul Manafort.

Zoogz: So what was the cure to peanut butter and banana fat-ass-osis? A cigar?

Megane 6.7: <chuckling> Yeah, right. Like this piece of crap would EVER get a...

Megane 6.7: Oh... poopy.

Zoogz: Fresh hell.

Zoogz: <Mr. Burns> EXCELLENT...

Megane 6.7: Oh, well, fancy that...

Megane 6.7: They... they made another one...

Megane 6.7: Yeah, cause, one definitely wasn't enough... heh heh...

Megane 6.7: Wow.... that's really something... I guess someday we're gonna...

Megane 6.7: And then I'm gonna have ta...

Megane 6.7: (starts flubbing his lips with his fingers)

Kizzy Caspy: While my brother loses his mind, I'd like to thank everybody for listening to this LP...

Kizzy Caspy: I'm Kizzy Caspy... see ya next time!

Megane 6.7: And welcome back, Mystery Science Theater 3000!

Megane 6.7: We missed you and we love you.

Megane 6.7: This button press is dedicated... to you.

FWOOSH!